I’m not talking about that relationship we all thought would last forever, or the guy who pretends to be a power top, but turn out to be a sissy bottom – I’m talking about the scales of doom that sit at the home of my Cambridge Consultant…But Lets back track (like all good Tarantino films, I thought I’d start this blog at the start of the third act)
So today has gone well, I totally slept through my alarm – or to accurate, I turned it off while I was dreaming about something more important. Actually, isn’t it funny how when you want to get back into a dream it rarely happens. Sometimes it’s just best to masturbate and then get on with your day. I did have a headache, now, I’m not sure if that was because I was tired or because of Cambridge – I had headaches in the first week of Sole Source in October and since this is Week One take 2, then I guess it’s not unexpected – like the nasty runny shit that I’d totally forgotten about. Nice.
So after rushing into work, I didn’t have breakfast – so settled for a coffee (of which throughout the day I would have 4.. or 5?) I did learn that there are 2g of carbs in skimmed milk. Like my life isn’t difficult enough! (for those who are new to this blog, I am a proper drama queen. I shouldn’t say this but my poor (poor because he has to put up with me) bf does call my “queeny”..
So after that bombshell, I had quite a busy day, but that didn’t stop me and the girls obsessing over calories. If we had an actual watercooler – that would be so fucking cool. Anyway, I literally had a Cambridge Chicken and Mushroom soup all day, which isn’t as nice as it sounds – I did though manage to increase my water intake though, so I’m up to about 2 litres as I write this and I’ll have another bottle (750ml) before I go to bed.
I’ve not had urges to snack, which is good – but then I did get my fill last night in Quality Street.
So this evening I went back to my Cambridge Consultant to pick up some Water flavouring (life saver) and some packs to get me through until I see her again on Saturday morning. Before I left I got on the scales at work that we are using for our Biggest Loser competition – well, I’d only lost 5lbs. Yes, I know – I’m amazing. Or so I thought.
After nearly getting hit by cars on my bike to get to my CWP (Cambridge Weight Plan for those in the cheap seats at the back) weigh in – and then deciding that the path would be better – I’m seriously never making that trip again on a weekday evening – I got there and stepped on the scales – I was 16st 9lb – now I was showing as 16st 2lbs at work. So now I don’t have a fucking clue. I am inclined to think that the fatter of the two is more accurate, because the scales are on a hard floor and even though they’ve been cruel to me in the past, just like when I’m guessing how much I’ve spent on those 0898 numbers, I like to overestimate so if I’m wrong it’s always a nice surprise, but I can’t expect miracles to happen overnight.
I’ve finished my culinary adventure with a chocolate mint shake, which immediately led to me a nice long trip in the toilet. Though I did get to read a few pages from The Hobbit. Multi-tasking – Told you, amazing.
I have though made a pledge to not just lose weight but to get back into running – I used to be a half-decent distance runner in the past and after talking to a colleague this week, I really miss it. So I’m going to dust of my trainers and squeeze back into my runner gear – where you can totally see my testicles – yeah, I know right.
Till next time you sexy people